Oh, How I Wish You Were My Little Brother

“Oh, how I wish you were my little brother, nursing at my Mother’s breasts; if I saw you outside, I could kiss you—surely no one would despise me! I would lead you and bring you to my Mother’s house, the one who taught me. I would give you spiced wine to drink, the nectar of my pomegranates. His left hand is under my head, and his right hand embraces me. I admonish you, O maidens of Jerusalem: “Do not arouse or awaken love until it pleases!”’ Song of Solomon 8:1-4 NET

Let’s continue our in-depth study of the Song of Solomon, Chapter 8, which represents the culmination of the beautiful, intimate relationship between Solomon and his bride, the Shulamite. In this chapter, we will specifically examine verses 1-4. These verses present challenges in determining the speaker, as the text employs two voices and perspectives. Based on the commentaries I have consulted, there is limited consensus regarding the identity of the speaker or the hearer across different interpretations. However, at least two distinct voices emerge in today’s passage.

When navigating these complexities, I find it helpful to refer to my word study vocabulary, which helps me unpack the text’s rich language and nuances. Additionally, I take my questions and insights to prayer, inviting the Holy Spirit to illuminate my understanding of what He desires to communicate through these verses. I ask for peace, guidance, and direction in revealing how these passages should be presented and taught, so that we may more deeply pursue the heart of God and grasp the profound love of Jesus that is eloquently expressed throughout this poetic and timeless work.

In Verse 1, the Shulamite woman begins with the poignant phrase, “Oh, how I wish you were my little brother.” This opening line immediately draws attention, yet it is ambiguous regarding her intended audience. While many biblical commentators suggest she is addressing the maidens of Jerusalem, I contend that she is addressing lost men and women who yearn for their connection to Christ.

To understand this perspective, we must consider the context established in Chapter 7:11. Here, the bride extends a heartfelt invitation to the Bridegroom, saying, “Come, my beloved, let us go out into the fields and lodge in the villages.” This call to action is significant. In John 4:35, Jesus remarks, “Don’t you say, ‘There are four more months, and then comes the harvest’? I tell you, look up and see that the fields are already white for harvest!” His words emphasize the urgency of recognizing spiritually ripe opportunities for outreach. Additionally, He commands His disciples in Mark 16:15, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.” These verses reveal the crucial nature of evangelism and the mission to reach those in need of salvation.

The bride’s invitation echoes this mission, indicating her desire to venture into the villages—places often neglected or overlooked in the hustle and bustle of life. She expresses a longing to “get up early to the vineyards and see whether the vines have budded, whether the grape blossoms have opened, and the pomegranates are in bloom” (Song of Solomon 7:12). This eagerness to explore the vineyards suggests her deliberate intent to observe growth and possibilities for nurturing relationships with those who do not yet comprehend the love of Jesus.

The answer to her motivation lies in Chapter 7:13, where she states, “The mandrakes give forth fragrance, and beside our doors are all choice fruits, new as well as old, which I have laid up for you, O my beloved.” Here, she speaks of a bounty—fruits that represent both new growth and spiritual maturity through outreach to others. Her desire to gather these fruits reflects her commitment to cultivating a community of faith enriched by the experiences of both the new believers and those seasoned in their faith.

The notion of laying up fruit at “our doors” indicates a shared responsibility and a communal effort in ministry. The use of the plural “doors” suggests the many entry points for connecting with the Bridegroom, symbolizing the various pathways through which believers can please Him with their fruit, both in their actions and in their testimony. In essence, every believer becomes part of a greater collective endeavor to draw others to Christ, fostering relationships that facilitate spiritual fruitfulness.

To put this in contemporary terms, the bride embodies the role of a soul winner, passionately seeking to lead as many people as possible into a transformative relationship with Jesus. Her mission is not just personal but communal; she desires to see others become her brothers and sisters in Christ, united in faith and love. Through her actions, she serves as a living testament to His grace, mercy, and the joyous invitation to experience His love.

“Oh, how I wish you were my little brother,” she expresses, a heartfelt longing that encapsulates her desire for others to feel embraced as family. In her vision, a warm sense of belonging and unconditional love flourishes among all believers. When a person receives salvation, they are spiritually reborn and become our brothers and sisters in Christ.

The Greek word “adelphos,” often translated as “brother,” denotes a deep familial bond among males of the same family lineage. However, in the New Testament Epistles, “adelphoi” assumes a broader meaning, encompassing both men and women and underscoring the significance of community within the faith. Furthermore, the root of “adelphos,” the word “delphus,” translates to “womb,” symbolizing the nurturing aspect of spiritual rebirth – the Mother’s womb.

Thus, when individuals are united in Christ, they experience a profound transformation, akin to being born from the womb of grace. This divine rebirth, rooted in the overwhelming grace of God, cultivates a new kinship among believers. Grace, personified as a nurturing mother, resides in every reborn soul, with a yearning to draw each person into a deep, personal relationship with Christ.

This longing for connection is a mark of spiritual maturity in the bride: an insatiable hunger for others to discover her Lord, to wholeheartedly love Him, and to commit their lives entirely to His service. In this journey, believers not only grow in their own faith but also bear the fruits of service and devotion, reflecting the deep lessons they have gleaned from their relationship with Christ. The desire for communal growth testifies to the transformative power of grace, binding brothers and sisters together in love and faith.

“Oh, how I wish you were my little brother, nursing at my mother’s breasts.” The word for “mother” in Hebrew is “em.” Almost exclusively, “em” is used to describe a mother in the Bible. There is one time, though, in Hebrew where this word “em” is used for parting, like in birth, when the baby parts from the Mother, birth as a parting, “they nursed at the breast of my mother.” Now, spiritually, we are examining this through the lens of typology: who is this Mother? What are these breasts? I believe that the Mother of the new birth process is the Holy Spirit of God. Jesus is the one who died for us, God the Father is the one who planned it, Jesus executed the Father’s plan by going to the cross and shedding His blood, and the Holy Spirit administers it, the Holy Spirit put us under conviction, and drew us to Jesus, and also birthed us into the family of God, He is the Mother in the new-birth process. Nursing at the breast, the Holy Spirit gives us nourishment, He gives us strength, understanding, and enlightenment by teaching us from the word of God. Our English bible says He is the comforter, the Greek says He is the “paraclete,” one who walks with us, talks with us, and helps us everywhere we go. It reminds me of the longing words of Paul, “Brothers and sisters, my heart’s desire and prayer to God on behalf of my fellow Israelites is for their salvation.” (Romans 10:1) “Oh, how I wish you were my little brother.” Most commentators argue that she is speaking to Solomon. I disagree; I believe she is talking to those who are lost and need a savior. She is taking her role as a soul-winner quite seriously.

“If I saw you outside” illustrates her intentional quest for lost souls in desperate need of a savior. She is not merely passively waiting; she actively seeks individuals who yearn for redemption and guidance. This metaphor is strikingly poignant, as we have all, at some point in our lives, found ourselves “outside” the grace of God—living without Christ, devoid of hope, meaning, and true purpose. I vividly recall a time when I felt like an outsider; it was a season filled with longing and uncertainty.

Then, through the profound work of the Holy Spirit, I experienced salvation and was welcomed into God’s familial embrace. The word “saw,” derived from the Hebrew term “matsa,” translates to “to fall upon” or “to befall.” This connotation underscores her active role in soul-winning. God is orchestrating these divine encounters, allowing souls to enter her life, as if they are “falling into her lap,” thereby signifying the miraculous nature of these conversions.

She has a deep desire for spiritual maturity and understands that the heart of the King—Christ—is focused on winning the lost. Her commitment to this mission reveals her understanding of the importance of reaching out and providing hope to those who feel abandoned, downtrodden, or forgotten. Through her efforts, she embodies grace and compassion, striving to bring others into the light of faith.

“I could kiss you—surely no one would despise me!” This heartfelt declaration opens a window onto a profound exploration of love, forgiveness, and the complexities of human relationships, evoking the parable of the Prodigal Son. This story, deeply rooted in themes of redemption, illustrates a transformative journey that resonates with our own struggles and triumphs.

In this parable, the Prodigal Son, in a moment of youthful arrogance and desperation, turns his back on his Father. By demanding his inheritance, he symbolically wishes for his Father’s death, seeking to escape the constraints of home for the allure of freedom and adventure. Venturing into a far-off country, he squanders his fortune on reckless living—lavishing money on extravagant pleasures and fleeting friendships. However, as quickly as his fortune comes, it fades away, leaving him isolated and destitute, tending pigs—an occupation that was both humiliating and demeaning for someone of his background.

In the depths of despair, he experiences a moment of clarity and humility, realizing, “I will go to my father.” The imagery of his Father waiting and watching from a distance is profound; when he finally spots his son returning on the horizon, he is filled with an overwhelming rush of compassion. He runs—not with restraint, but with sheer joy—toward his son, embracing him tightly and covering him with kisses of love and forgiveness (see Luke 15:11-32).

This beautiful act of reconciliation encapsulates what the bride is expressing: “I will welcome you back as if you were a lost son who has returned to life by coming home.” Her words reflect a deep yearning not only for reunion but also for healing and restoration. In a similar vein, the reunion of brothers Jacob and Esau showcases the power of forgiveness. After years of estrangement due to betrayal and conflict, when they meet again, Esau runs to Jacob, embracing him with tears of relief and joy, symbolizing an emotional healing that transcends their past grievances (Genesis 33:4). The kiss exchanged in their embrace is emblematic of her desire to extend the same grace to others.

When she poignantly asserts, “Surely no one would despise me,” she articulates a genuine concern of being belittled or dismissed for her efforts by reaching out to the lost—both within her community and before God at the judgment seat of Christ. “The fruit of the righteous is like a tree producing life, and the one who wins souls is wise” (Proverbs 11:30). She passionately aims to be recognized for her wisdom in seeking to gather the weary and the wandering into a nurturing community, longing to stand before her Lord without shame, ridicule, or bear the weight of belittlement.

The Apostle Paul captures this spirit of determination and discipline through a compelling metaphor of athletic competition: “Do you not know that all the runners in a stadium compete, but only one receives the prize? So run to win. Each competitor must exercise self-control in everything they do. They do it to receive a perishable crown, but we receive an imperishable one. So I do not run uncertainly or box like one who hits only air. Instead, I subdue my body and make it my slave, so that after preaching to others, I myself will not be disqualified” (1 Corinthians 9:24-27).

With clarity and fervor, she envisions herself as a devoted soul-winner, eager to embrace those who have strayed, welcoming them into a family enriched by love and faith, nourished by the teachings of the Scriptures—the “milk of the Word” provided through the guiding presence of the (Mother) Holy Spirit. By saying, “I’ll kiss you, encourage you, and welcome you home,” she encapsulates not only a gesture of affection but also a commitment to supporting others in their spiritual journeys. Ultimately, she yearns to hear the affirmation, “Well done, wise soul-winner.” This echoes the words of her master: “His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master’” (Matthew 25:23).

Let us immerse ourselves in the richness of verse two: “I would lead you and bring you to my Mother’s house, the one who taught me. I would give you spiced wine to drink, the nectar of my pomegranates.” This passage is deeply profound, and my interpretation may diverge from conventional commentaries, yet I am convinced that it presents Solomon expressing his tender sentiments to his bride.

This interpretation stems from His keen observation of her earnest desire to win souls for the kingdom. Solomon has witnessed her spiritual growth, marveling at her journey through various stages of maturity, each marked by trials and triumphs that have shaped her character. Simon Peter beautifully captures this process, stating, “Through these things, he has bestowed on us his precious and most magnificent promises, so that by means of what was promised, you may become partakers of the divine nature, after escaping the worldly corruption produced by evil desire. For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith excellence; to excellence, knowledge; to knowledge, self-control; to self-control, perseverance; to perseverance, godliness; to godliness, brotherly affection; and to brotherly affection, unselfish love.” (2 Peter 1:4-7). Here, we see an invitation to a transformative journey characterized by growth in faith and virtue.

Moreover, this concept resonates deeply with the words of Jesus, who emphasized God’s “agape” love for all humanity: “For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world should be saved through him.” (John 3:16-17). The bride’s spiritual maturation is illustrated as she passionately shares the boundless love of God with others, prompting a tender response from her Bridegroom: ‘My darling, I could hug you; you are sweeter to me than you have ever been. I am going to lead you; I will bring you into my Mother’s house, the one who imparted wisdom to me.”

Some may contest this interpretation, arguing that if Solomon represents Jesus, it implies that He has united with His bride and thus would not need to lead her into His Mother’s house. However, if we consider the Mother as a symbolic representation of the Holy Spirit, this idea aligns harmoniously with Jesus’ words to His disciples: “But I tell you the truth, it is to your advantage that I am going away. For if I do not go away, the Advocate (paraclete) will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.” (John 16:7). This profound promise assures us that the Holy Spirit will dwell within believers, guiding them into profound truths. He will be a source of comfort and inspiration, leading them to understand the depth of Christ’s teachings and love.

This theme is powerfully echoed in Isaiah’s prophetic words, spoken 700 years before Jesus walked the earth. Jesus shares about His Father, saying, “The Sovereign Lord has given me the capacity to be his spokesman so that I know how to help the weary. He wakes me up every morning; he makes me alert so I can listen attentively as disciples do.” This statement captures the essence of Jesus as not only a teacher but also as a devoted learner, reliant on the guidance of His Father, and the leading of the Holy Spirit, ready to respond to the needs of those who are lost and weary.

During His earthly journey, Jesus exemplified more than authority; He embodied humility and the willingness to learn. “During his earthly life, Christ offered both requests and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to the one who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his devotion. Although he was a son, he learned obedience through the things he suffered.” (Hebrews 5:7-8). This powerful passage underscores that Jesus fully engaged with the human experience, facing challenges that deepened His capacity for empathy and obedience.

As the bride, now a fervent advocate for salvation, passionately reaches out to others, urging, “Oh, come be my little brother, be my sister; let me introduce you to the Holy Spirit so that you may be born again into the family of God and be nourished with the pure, life-giving milk of the Word of God.” Her mission as a soul-winner is reverently acknowledged and celebrated. The Bridegroom, deeply enamored by her zeal and compassion, responds tenderly: “Let me guide you; I will lead you in paths of righteousness for my name’s sake. Let’s go to my Mother’s house, focusing on the goodness and transformative power of the Holy Spirit.”

When Solomon presents the invitation, “I would give you spiced wine to drink, the nectar of my pomegranates,” it is layered with rich symbolism. The pomegranate, vibrant and red on the inside, filled with sweet juice reminiscent of Christ’s blood, represents our Savior’s sacrifice. The phrase “I would give you spiced wine to drink” evokes a cherished offering, suggesting the sweetness and richness inherent in Christ’s sacrifice. He beckons His bride to draw near, to gather around the cross of suffering, to partake deeply in the spiced wine, and to share in the glorious feast of Calvary, where the pathway to salvation is beautifully laid out.

In this sacred act, we metaphorically consume the body and blood of Jesus, which signifies embracing the death of our natural selves while releasing the vibrant life of the spiritual man, empowered to walk in obedience to Christ and guided by the Holy Spirit: “Jesus said to them, ‘I tell you the solemn truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in yourselves. The one who eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink.’” (John 6:53-56)

Through this intricate exploration of the text, we unveil a richly woven tapestry of spiritual growth, divine love, and the transformative power of faith—intertwining the bride’s experiences with the steadfast promises and intimate guidance of the Bridegroom, revealing a profound journey into the heart of God’s love and purpose.

Verse 3 beautifully articulates, “His left hand is under my head, and his right hand embraces me.” This profound line portrays the bride’s intimate dialogue as she speaks with tenderness about her Beloved. In this moment of vulnerability, she yearns for closeness, saying to the Bridegroom, “Love me, Lord; hug me; draw me unto Yourself; I long to be enveloped in Your passionate embrace.” This deep yearning reflects the heartfelt experience of a child of God receiving the boundless love of Jesus, who clothes us in His merciful and compassionate embrace.

I find immense comfort in knowing that His mighty hands encircle me, offering unwavering protection and steadfast love. It feels as though He has gently lifted me and placed me securely in His hands, just as He resides in the Father’s protective grasp. This understanding fosters a profound sense of safety and security within me, and I am endlessly grateful for this unbreakable bond. The Lord declares in Isaiah 49:16a, “Look, I have inscribed your name on my palms,” evoking imagery of intimacy and commitment. This visual of “His left hand is under my head, and His right hand embraces me” illustrates the exquisite love and care that envelops every child of God.

At the Last Supper, the Gospel recounts that “One of his disciples, the one Jesus loved, was at the table to the right of Jesus in a place of honor” (John 13:23). This disciple, understood to be John, embodies the depth of love and trust shared with Jesus. In various translations, it describes him reclining on Jesus’ breast or bosom, capturing the essence of warm intimacy and the comfort of being close to the Savior’s heart.

I like to envision that when I am nestled in my Savior’s embrace, I can hear His heartbeat—the rhythmic pulse that willingly laid down His life for all, a heartbeat that yearns for the return of each wandering prodigal Son or daughter, and a heartbeat that desires for all who call upon His name to be born anew. If you have ever felt the enveloping warmth of being embraced by the Savior, you understand that it transcends sentimental emotionalism; it embodies the safest haven in the universe, found under the sacred shadow of His wings. As Psalm 91:4 beautifully affirms, “He will shelter you with His wings; you will find safety under His wings. His faithfulness is like a shield or a protective wall,” providing a refuge of peace amidst life’s storms and uncertainties.

The terms’ side’ and ‘bosom’ function as rich idioms that evoke a deep sense of closeness and nearness, capturing the essence of love and intimacy. This concept finds profound expression in the biblical passage, “No one has ever seen God. The only one, himself God, who is in closest fellowship with the Father, has made God known” (John 1:18). This verse articulates the extraordinary relationship that Jesus, the only begotten Son, shares with the Father—a unique bond that underscores His role as the sole mediator between humanity and the divine.

In this sacred dialogue, the bride proclaims her adoration, saying, “That’s my Bridegroom, my Solomon, my Savior, the one and only unique Son, who dwells in the bosom of the Father.” This evocative imagery portrays their relationship as a tapestry crafted with deep affection and unwavering connection, suggesting a profound emotional intimacy. Jesus, who cherished such tender expressions of love, is depicted as nestled against the heart of His Father, illustrating a bond filled with divine warmth and understanding.

The bride’s heartfelt expression reveals her spiritual yearning: “If I obey, I’ll be filled with the Holy Spirit, and I’ll reside within the comforting embrace of my Mother’s home, where the boundless gifts of the Spirit of God are offered to me.” Her obedience is not merely a duty but a pathway to experiencing the Holy Spirit’s nurturing presence, drawing her closer to her Bridegroom, who already enjoys an intimate relationship with His heavenly Father. In this sacred space, divine truths are illuminated.

The phrase “...has made God known” in John 1:18 is translated from the Greek verb “exēgeomai,” which conveys the idea of thorough explanation and interpretation. This etymology gives rise to the term “exegete,” which denotes one who elucidates, delineates, and crafts a narrative. Within this context, Jesus does not simply recount facts about the Father; rather, He intricately exegetes the very nature and heart of God the Father, revealing His character with exquisite detail and clarity—each word a brushstroke in the divine portrait.

Moreover, the comforting assurance found in Psalm 37:24 resonates deeply with believers: “Even if he trips, he will not fall headlong, for the Lord holds his hand.” This imagery invites us to envision the Lord’s vigilant presence in our lives—“Let His left hand envelop me in protective support, while His right hand encircles me in love and guidance.” Such a depiction of divine companionship reassures us that we are never solitary on our journey; instead, we are cradled and directed by the loving hands of our Savior, enveloped in His grace and strength.

In Verse 4, the bride passionately asserts her conviction with a voice that rings with authority and intent, declaring, “I admonish you, O maidens of Jerusalem: ‘Do not arouse or awaken love until it pleases!’” This poignant reminder encapsulates a profound truth: God’s love is not only sweet and precious but also transcendent, far beyond mere human endeavor. It is not a love that can be conjured through our own desires or efforts. The bride earnestly cautions the maidens of Jerusalem to refrain from seeking God’s love through self-serving ambitions, prideful aspirations, or material greed. Instead, she underscores the vital importance of waiting patiently for the Lord, allowing His divine love to pursue them in His own perfect timing.

Having navigated her own tumultuous experiences, she has learned, often through painful trials, the consequences of failing to heed love’s call when it beckons at the right moment. This can lead to a cascade of heartache and turmoil, vividly illustrated in Chapter 5. Her mission is to protect these impressionable young women from repeating the missteps she made in her own relationship with Solomon. She powerfully conveys that they should not attempt to force the awakening of love; instead, they must cultivate trust that He will gently stir their hearts when the moment is divinely ordained. The phrase “…until it pleases” is particularly evocative; it suggests that when the Lord chooses to draw near, it will be a moment brimming with joy and excitement, a divine encounter that fills the heart with warmth.

True joy blossoms when we surrender to the Spirit of God, allowing Him to pursue us rather than chasing after His affection ourselves. His love envelops us, captivating our hearts not because of any deeds we have performed but solely through His boundless grace. Reflect on the Shulamite; what extraordinary qualities did she possess that drew Solomon’s gaze? As a humble country girl, she was an ordinary shepherdess devoted to tending her family’s vineyards. Occupying the lower tiers of social hierarchy, she seemed to have little to offer, only sunburnt skin earned from her toil in the fields beneath the blistering sun. Yet when Solomon encountered her, he perceived a unique beauty that transcended physical appearance. Their relationship blossomed gradually, with his love for her deepening in ways that illustrated the extraordinary power of recognizing and cherishing the unique essence within another.

In this, we find reflections of our own journeys. The Father gazed upon each of us and discerned something uniquely profound, sending His Son to pursue us with relentless love and draw us into a relationship with Him. Our only task is to believe and to respond wholeheartedly when He calls our names and visits us. In this dynamic lies the exquisite sweetness of the Father’s affection: He recognized our urgent need for a Savior and gifted us the ultimate treasure—His one and only Son—to redeem and restore us, bringing us back into a harmonious relationship with Him akin to the fellowship that existed in the beginning.

The Shulamite’s voice resonates through the ages, urging us with heartfelt sincerity, “Do not approach God driven solely by your fervent passions. Allow Him to pass by in His own time. When He does draw near, be prepared to walk gracefully alongside Him, entering into a deeper communion with Him as He takes your hand and leads you into the lush sanctuary of His vineyard.”

Stephen Barnett